I will be in the best place in my life. Healed with a heart stitched together by time and love and still holding on to the hope that real love will one day find me. It will be the beginning of a new journey in a new city full of new beginnings and new possibilities.
I’ll have enough hope for both of us.
I’ll open myself up to you completely. We will share a magical night.
We will have a lot in common. We will also have a lot of differences, which makes this even more enticing to me.
We will click instantly. We will start growing closer, constantly texting throughout the days we’re apart and soaking up the moments we’re together.
For five minutes, I realize that I’m actually happy and I’ll pretend to not want this as much, but my heart will jump every time I hear your voice or see your beautiful face.
I don’t need you but I’ll be secretly insecure because I’ve never wanted anyone this much. 
I’ll share my past with you.
We will make promises and plans saying it doesn’t matter.
You’ll need reassurance that I’m okay knowing we won’t last, because you were honest from the beginning about not wanting anything serious. 
I’ll lie and tell you that everything is fine. 
I find myself caught up in the way you make my heart feel as if it’s going to burst open and I’ll tell you that I’m falling in love with you.
You’ll look at me with empathy.
You’ll tell me that you don’t feel the same. We will sit across from each other in awkward silence.
You’ll tell me that I deserve better. I’ll tell you that I want you and you”ll kiss me. You’ll leave me with hope that this is going to last.
After the weekend everything will slowly fall apart but I’ll deny it every step of the way.
I’ll tell myself that you really love me but you’re too much of a coward to admit it.
You’ll pick comfort because you’re too afraid to pick something that may actually make you happy.
You’ll say that you care about me but you don’t love me.
I’ll cry myself to sleep at night, missing you.
Every time my phone beeps, I hope it’s you, telling me that you miss me, too.
I’ll spend time with my friends, trying to move on with life. I’ll even laugh and find happiness.
I’ll meet a woman.
She will be wonderful.
There will be a lot of laughter and happy moments….
…but she won’t be you.
Even though we don’t talk anymore, I will still feel you in my heart, I will see you in my dreams and I will still want desperately to spend my life with you.
I will be convinced that you don’t notice me anymore. 
I’ll finally admit the truth of our situation to myself, I don’t mean anything to you at all. I never did. 
You’ll be somewhere on the other side of town, sleeping next to another woman.
A few months after you steal my heart, I’ll convince everyone I’m over you. Tears will well up in my eyes as I write a story about you that you’ll never read.

Jms